It's the last week of the year and I'm sitting on my couch in Portland with both cats on my lap, a mug of something warm, and the strong desire to hand out awards to brands that made me feel things this year. Let's do superlatives.
Most Likely to Make You Rethink Everything: Patagonia. Gave away a $3 billion company to fight climate change. Set a standard that nobody else can reach. Proved that purpose and profit can coexist if you're willing to redefine what profit means. Brand of the decade, honestly.
When Glossier built a $1.2 billion valuation primarily through Instagram, they proved that a feed could be a storefront, a community, and a brand manifesto simultaneously. Their comments section did more brand-building than most companies' entire marketing budgets.
Most Dramatic Entrance: ChatGPT. Showed up on November 30th and by December 15th had more think pieces written about it than most brands get in a lifetime. Whether it changes everything or nothing, the launch velocity alone was a masterclass in product-market fit meeting cultural timing.
Biggest Self-Own: Twitter. Was acquired, lost half its workforce, lost major advertisers, rolled out and reverted paid verification in approximately 48 hours, and somehow became more chaotic and more essential simultaneously. Elon turned a $44 billion acquisition into the world's most expensive improv show.
Best Unintentional Brand Ambassador: Taylor Swift. Didn't intend to become an antitrust advocate, but her fan base's fury at Ticketmaster prompted a DOJ investigation and congressional hearing. When your audience loves you so much they accidentally lobby the federal government, that's brand loyalty operating at a civilizational level.
Worst Due Diligence: Everyone Who Partnered With FTX. Tom Brady, Steph Curry, Larry David, the Miami Heat, Mercedes F1. Billions in brand associations evaporated overnight. The lesson: if something seems too good to be true in crypto, it is definitely too good to be true in crypto.
Most Avoidable Crisis: Balenciaga. Had the hottest brand in luxury fashion. Chose to run campaigns that featured children in disturbing contexts. Proved that provocation without guardrails eventually crashes into something unforgivable. The recovery will take years if it comes at all.
Best Strategic Retreat: Instagram. Tried to become TikTok. Users revolted. The Kardashians posted about it. Instagram rolled it back. Sometimes the bravest strategy is admitting you were wrong and going home.
Most Entertaining Meltdown: Netflix. Lost subscribers for the first time. Launched an ad tier after years of saying they never would. Started cracking down on password sharing. Went from "disruptor" to "incumbent desperately defending market share" faster than anyone thought possible.
Quietest Win: Apple. Didn't do anything flashy. Just kept making things that work. The Always-On Display isn't revolutionary, but it's exactly what Apple does best: take an existing technology and implement it so well that it feels like they invented it. Boring wins.
The Always-On Display isn't revolutionary, but it's exactly what Apple does best: take an existing technology and implement it so well that it feels like they invented it.
Best Schadenfreude: Meta/Zuckerberg's Metaverse. Renamed the entire company around a bet that nobody asked for, spent billions on virtual reality that looks like a 2005 video game, and watched the stock drop 60% for the year. The legs meme alone.
That's my list. 2022 was a year that proved, once again, that the brands that win aren't the loudest or the most provocative or the most reactive. They're the ones that know exactly who they are and refuse to compromise on it, even when the market begs them to.
Here's to a 2023 with fewer fraud collapses and more brands brave enough to be boring in the best possible way. See you next year.